EXTRA EXTRA EXTRA Iron Buffalo Hires...

Yes, really, to protect the safety of my grandson who will be the riding in the Mule's inaugural ride, we had to hire a "Crash Test Dummy".
Don't laugh, this is a serious, yes a very serious occupation. Not many can say that they were selected for this acclaimed position.
Iron Buffalo felt that no expense should be spared in hiring the most qualified "CTD" in the state.
The Mule has kicked one, bucked a few, and now today was the final test of the road worthiness of the Mule. 
Seriously, I can not take my grandson on a ride in a vehicle that I do not feel is safe, period.
Enter the CTD (crash test dummy)

"Marg, you want to go for a ride in the Mule"...

And off we go, the rest is history... putting the Mule through the paces with a highly skilled CTD on board.
At first I can see the CTD has a tentative look, but as we proceed a smile starts to arise.
Is the smile because the CTD does not realize what is coming or is it that she has also bonded with the Mule?
About 20 miles into the test ride the Mule starts to make a 
serious screeching, whining sound. At first I feel it is the speedo head complaining, then as I slow and downshift I start to wonder if it is the clutch or second gear, shit, not good! 
My CTD does not register my alarm, GOOD, but I am starting to get my squishy pants again. We are 20 miles from home and I have not figured out what the screeching noise is.
I pull over thinking that maybe I have lost trans or secondary drive oil. No that's not it, no visible leaks. 
I check on my CTD and she is all smiles, so off we go. Then the screeching starts again. I flip up my modular helmet and start to listen, listen and then it appears to be coming from the instrument cluster (this was my initial thought). As any great test driver does I start to smack the speedo and low and behold the screeching stops. I continue on and it starts again. I smack it again. It stops. OK, so now my squishy pants start to go away. We then continue on our test ride and every time it screams I smack the gauges. Then I realize that if I smack the tach, it stops.
I can even feel the screaming from the cluster on the tach side. There is nothing like the feel/sound of a screaming mechanical tach...
Problem diagnosed, tach drive is dry. Nothing like a set of squishy pants and a few hard smacks to figure something out at 60 mph...
My CTD is still all smiles as I tell her we are going to enter I-25 for a couple of exits (NOT!) so instead I get back on the frontage roads and see how the Mule performs.
Then I suggest that we take a few dirt roads to see how the Mule performs on dirt. Low and behold the dirt road I wanted to drive on is gone, the bastards paved it, WTF.
Anyway off we go on a wonderful new asphalt paved road. Eventually we find a "dirt road" to take the Mule on. As I exit I look over my left shoulder and it says, "No motorized vehicles". OOPS! Kind of feel bad, but not really... nobody around but me and my CTD.
50 miles later we arrive home, just me and my CTD. All smiles and no problems other than figuring out how to fix a non serviceable tachometer.
Get the hammer!
Anyway, long story short, I figure out how to get it apart WITHOUT BREAKING ANYTHING, add a little clock oil here and there and boom badda bing, the tach has stopped screeching. The needle moves a little slow, as I figure out clock oil is not the right viscosity for a tach, but who cares? It's not screechin' anymore...

Tomorrow BC & me take the Mule out to spank her! Stay tuned...

W

Monday & the Mule Skinner

Information is the most precious commodity in the world. Those that do not realize this will end up suffering...

I have always pushed the limits, or as some would say pushed the envelope. 
On the other side I have always been smart enough to know my knowledge boundaries. Though not my experimentation boundaries, heck I scraped an exhaust can on "Sally" (another story...).

Before I had even bought the Mule I had contacted my "Skinner" to ask about the Mule. He felt that I was headed in the right direction and that my budget was good. 
The Skinner is probably the most experienced sidecar rider/monkey/mechanic in the state of Colorado and or the Rocky Mt. region. 
Or as I would affectionately state, my sidecar guru.

I have been working on the Mule for over 3 weeks, talking with my Skinner, picking up tidbits of his 70+ years of experience and trying to get the Mule road worthy. All of this effort and self imposed stress came to a head today when I was able to get the Skinner to ride my Mule.
I had not told him anything about what I had done to her, just asked that he take her out and spank her. 
I had to. Harsh to say but I am planning on taking my grandson on the maiden voyage in the Mule in 5 days...
Safety first, if she can't cut the muster, I will scrap her. Hard to say but just the simple facts of life. If an animal has to be put down, so be it, man up and git'r done.

I had parked the Mule out front of the garage as I knew he was coming over. What I did not know was that he had taken time to inspect my Mule before he even let me know he was at the house. Kind of like the "Mule Whisperer" shit going on. He had to get to know the beast without distraction, form a relationship before he mounted and tried to tame my Mule.
Once he announced he was at my home we talked a little, he immediately pointed out a couple of flaws that I had suspected and told me he was ready to go.
I drove lead and took the Skinner on a route that would put the Mule through the paces as he spanked her. As I looked in the review I could see that the Mule was a' bucking, not yet comfortable with this new rider, and then as time wore on I could see that the Skinner had won over the Mule. He was makin' her dance, makin' her fly and just becoming one with the Mule. 
Years of riding experience can not be mimicked. You can only gain this by trial, years of riding and an unexplained bonding with your machine and or any machine you mount. 
Or becoming one, man & machine.
I could clearly see this in the rear view, he was one with the Mule. Hard to explain but such a joy to see uninhibited...
Once we pulled back into the driveway the Skinner had a smile, one that only another rider can understand. 
First thing he says is that; "these handle bars suck"! I was totally relieved and happy, as I hated them from the first ride I had on the Mule. He then told me that the hack shock is toast. 
Both of these problems were things that stuck in my craw from the beginning. 
My instincts told me these two items were problems, I just needed confirmation from the Skinner.
Over all the Skinner had praise for the performance of my Mule. He commented on how well she pulled the load, how she tracked straight and true, and that the set up I had done was good, safe and ready to roll.
He felt that other than the crappy angle of the handle bar, and the blown shock she was ready to rock & roll.
Music to my ears, I took a leap in faith, spent about a year searching for a Mule I could afford and today the blessings showed.
My Mule is now part of the herd...

W

Becoming one... (long story, sorry)

It's hard to explain?

I have owned/driven/played with probably over a 1000 or more "machines" (with wheels, and tracks, can you say Thiokol), yes really. I can send you a list... 

I feel that I got my zen (genetics maybe?) from mom & dad. I was raised around their machines and their love of the machine.

Anyway I have always formed a "relationship" with my machines with wheels, (computers and other tech I loath, I still use a flip phone by choice) and have always named them. My daughter Stacey once pointed this out to me and I had never realized it before. I form a love/hate relationship with my machines. 

Sometimes I am initially scared by them. I then try and learn their style, and usually I can empower them to allow me to smile. 

I can also send their piece of shit ass to the scrap yard. I can only take so much of "the bonding"...

The Mule has entered into my world of machines.

Today was a scheduled day of experimenting/test driving on the Mule for me. I even remembered to take a tool kit with me, yeah send me a thank you note on that one...

AGATT (All Gear All The Time) again cause my baby still scares the shit out of me. She ain't friendly just yet. I am still trying to earn her respect.

I rigged the broken tach cable so it would not do any damage to the tach drive gear (major $$$ to fix as it is inside the engine) by removing the damaged cable and sheath. I then removed the broken cable from the sheath and reinstalled the empty sheath. Thus protecting the tach drive gear inside the engine from the outside elements.

I don't need no stinkin' tach, I know that red line is when shit starts to vacate the engine casings! Right?

I then do a visual of all major mounts (that I touched) check my tire pressure, add BG MOA (great product) to the crankcase in hopes that this will help to protect my Mule under high heat. Say my prayers, gear up and off I go.

Initially as I am driving through my neighborhood I can not really decipher much. Yeah it stops, it accelerates but not enough speed to decide if you are going to die today...

Out I go onto the first 45+ mph side road. I notice that I am having to pull hard, yeah really hard on the left handle bar to get the Mule to track. I keep going as my mind processes the minuscule amount of information I have stored on a sidecar hack and how they are "supposed to handle" I ain't no wussie, I can throw a motorcycle around so on I go. Shit, as I get up to speed or around 60+ mph the Mule wants to gallop off the road to the right. I can form a less abusive straight line as I get everything settled and then she kind of evens out. Then I start to notice that the hack dives severely to the right under steering correction, braking (normal)  or farting...and does not rebound well.

So after about 7 miles I kind of have my Mule figured out, yeah right. I pull over after turning around and shift my 60 lbs ballast bag in the hack to the left and then sit off the seat to the left as I ride and regain a significant amount of control. Not enough to get rid of my squishy pants but enough to ponder what is happening as I head for home.

OK so now I know that the Mule wants to vacate the road @ 60+ mph to the right. Shifting weight to the left makes a noticeable improvement in the ability to steer and get the Mule to track straight.

I get back to the garage and park her, shed my gear and stand back and look at the Mule from behind. 

Yeah I am lookin' a Mule in the ass...

I notice that the bike is leaning to the right into the hack. I would guess between 2-5 degrees at least.

Hum, if a motorcycle leans in either direction it will turn in that direction.

I look at an adjustable rod connecting the bike to the sidecar and say why is that adjustable? 

I call the tech line of the sidecar manufacturer and ask pointed question about my ride.

The tech guy is very nice and has been for the last 6 months with my "tard questions".

He gives a lot of latitude to a motorcycle safety training company, thank God. Anyway I can tell he knows that he has someone that understands about 20% of what he is saying. He is nice and repeatedly says "have you read the download about sidecar installation from our web site". I humbly say no and tell him I will, I promise ( I don't need no stinkin' directions, I am a MAN).

Again I stand looking at the ass of my Mule and it clicks, it is leaning to the right, or into the hack. I then call my sidecar guru who is totally patient with my lack of understanding and he says yes the bike should lean left or at least centered. OK enough info for me. I break loose the lock nut (hammer required, cool! I get to beat my Mule) and adjust the rod and low and behold the bike stands up straight and leans to the left. Eureka! Amazing how shit works if you know what you are doing...

I contemplate how this changed the dynamics of the bike and then think, I have ballast in the hack now, the guy said it should lean to the left without a passenger (or pillion, my grandson Bryce). I leave the 120 lbs ballast in and "eyeball"(scientific verbiage) the Mule from the rear. Sure as shit the Mule is standing upright! I play with it a little, gear up, take my trusted hammer with me and out I go on my next test drive. WOW what a difference a little geometry makes (never took a class, almost failed algerbra but WTF?) the Mule tracked 80-90% better. I pulled over once, smacked the lock nut with the hammer (love the use of a hammer) and tweaked it a little more. Off I went saddled to my Mule, learning all the way.

Other notes;

the hacks shock is blown, leaking and does not operate properly. The tech guy says that you might be able to rebuild it or, spend $500.00 to upgrade the suspension that we figured out 2 years later, was not adequate on your sidecar, great.

Once I hooked up the lights for the sidecar from the bike I noticed the right side turn signals did not work well. They operated fast and what appeared to be hard on the relay. Fast clicks instead of a steady click.

I asked my mechanic what this might mean and he said that the sidecar was drawing to much voltage for the circuit. 

Cool, his thoughts made sense, I ask him; "should I snip a wire on the bike or remove an unneeded bulb", he turns his head as he thinks and says "remove the bulb". As I am driving home I think about all of the light bulbs I have replaced in our home to more energy efficient ones. Somewhere I have heard about LED bulbs for vehicles that will draw less voltage. Yeah this might fix my problem.

I ride the Mule to my local parts store and yes they have LED 1156 & 1157 bulbs that I can buy @  $12.50 each are you F'in serious! Well I can not spare any expense to make the Mule road worthy, period. I am stuck with what little, no wait the serious lack money that I have left has to go to feeding the Mule.

I get the bulbs installed and what 'ya know the problem is solved by using less energy, just more money I don't have. Wish my life always worked like that, problem solved by less energy... NOT!

Tomorrow Bryce (my pillion) and I will "scout" our course for the charity ride on the 27th.

I just hope and pray the Mule can stand, not buck, and deliver.

W 

The Mule lives...

It's alive!

I finished up with the last of the initial repairs on the Mule. The rear brake pads, and the air box to carb hoses installation. The rear brake fluid was clear as the Mississippi river, with no mud! Flushed the fluid until she was runnin' clear, everything worked as it should.

Then as any good test pilot does...

I'm off on a 50 mile ride putting her through the moves, she actually did quite well. Went out onto 76 East so I could get up to speed, cruises fine @ 75-80 mph pulling 5-6000 rpm's. That is until the Mule spits the tach cable out. I pull over on an off ramp, do a once over to make sure she ain't bleedin', and re-attach the cable on a very hot engine with no tools...

Note to self:

If you're going on a test drive take some basic tools, baling wire and duct tape, ya dumb ass...

Start up again, tach is working great, oops no tach again. Well seeing as this problem won't go away, time to return to base. 

Overall the performance was good other than the position of the handle bars. They are made for midgets not gorilla like armed people such as myself! My throttle hand kept going to sleep because of the awkward position. Consider a clock dial, my hands were @ 10 & 2 o'clock (imagine holding a car steering wheel) pointing down at about a 150 degree angle... The position will be perfect for our senior 3 wheel instructor, just great. I am a 3 & 9 type rider, 95-100 degree all day long. Oh well we will see what the future holds for the Mule's bar...

Interesting thing about the bike, or maybe it is my age coming out. 

This bike was considered a top tier bagger/cruiser in it's day. I would not last on a all day trip on this bike by itself.  I have not ridden a bike that was this touchy to wind, road grooves and general stability at speed in a long time. 

I mean like you fart and the mule twitches. With the hack on the Mule, the ride will become much more pleasant, or so I hope. 

The bike is heavy enough just does not even come close to the Super Tanker II in the comfort arena.

"Super Tanker II"

My thought is the wheel base difference. The Mule is a heavy bike, coming in just over 600 lbs, but still compared to the 850 lbs Super Tanker II? Going to measure and see.

When I got back to the garage I let it idle to see what the oil temp would do. On my test ride she was consistently under 200 F (high 80's ambient) with the air flowing, good, but as soon as I would slow or come to a stop BEHIND THE EVER PRESENT LINE OF SEMI's in Colorado at a stop light, she would climb to 250. At idle after a long hard ride the temp was about 260 F. Concern. Will take a serious look at installing an oil cooler.

Moved it into the garage shut her down and went to get the hack (sidecar) out of the shed for the installation process. Everything was going fine right up to the point I can't find the F'n mounting bolts. Heck I can't even remember where I put them, so I spend 1/2 hour grinding the gears of memory, looking everywhere I can think of and finally off to the hardware store I go...

$30 bucks later the Mule is whole again. I then check all mountings again, air up the tire, wire the lights for the hack and off on test ride #2 of the day. Just around the neighborhood, (little tired and sore from test ride #1, no ballast) and the old Mule does very well. I am excited. Today once I have the ballast for the hack, I will try and get the rig out on the highway to see what happens. I talked with my sidecar guru and he his hopefully coming by on Monday to test ride the Mule and sign off on her, at least that is what I hope & pray...

I now feel a lot better about the build and how the restoration of the Mule is going. I still have 8 days to repair the tach, fix some wiring issues, install the hack windscreen and luggage rack (for advertising) and have my mechanic check her over and then ride, ride, ride, my Mule.

W

Always loved a good t-shirt...

OK, so this blog post is not for you mild mannered respectable people (REALLY TURN AWAY NOW!). 
Though this post is "OK" for the rest of you assholes (who will understand)...
I warned you! Ladies turn away now! 

Men belly up to the bar you'll need at least a yard to get through all of them, maybe two yards (real men only, Caitlin not allowed) ...

I have always tried to speak my mind through my t-shirts. It is always worth the wait (this can be upwards of a year wearing the shirt, really, yeah! I wash it sometimes...) to see the light bulbs go off in someones head when they actually take the time to read your shirt...

I found nirvana today. I'm in!
T-shirt offensive heaven. 
Not sure how I found this web site but hey I am still laughing.
If you are really, really, really, YES REALLY bored, tired of the hum drum of work, start looking through this incredible collection of ways to offend most people and make the truly brilliant ones laugh...
Maybe it is the other way around? 
I don't give a F'...

http://www.shotdeadinthehead.com/nsearch?page=1&pushnav=menu&keywords=offensive&refine=y&tags=Offensive

Couple of my fav's;

One of my all time fav's currently in use;

Anytime I helped someone move, I wore the shirt. Any job interview I had, I wore the shirt...

The hat has significance also...

So much to see & so much to buy, so little time & so little money...

At least I can still laugh until I cry!

W

If you are kicked in the ass by a Mule...

are you a "jack ass"?

Well looking back at today I would say I am a jack ass.

I have been working hard to get "The Mule" ready for my 1st DGR charity event.

Today I finished up a huge amount of work on the mule from the past week.

Installed the newly rebuilt front forks, rebuilt the fuel pet cock (that does not leak now!) new rear tire, changing the fluids in the final drive, the secondary trans, and the engine, lubing & adjusting cables, checking brake fluids *, installing the newly resurfaced king/queen seat, and fixing a major pain in the ass. The air box rubber hoses from the carbs are crap. I struggled for at least an hour to get four rubber hoses to almost fit, so they can seal, so I can test ride the mule... All went pretty well no real problems. 
(I have ordered new air box hoses to install next week as I doubt the fit of the current ones).
In the process of doing a large amount of work on a bike, you look at everything and notice things. Various hoses/wiring that needs zip ties, worn boots, things leaking, certain things that need adjustment or replacement and on and on.

On to the jack ass part...
For some reason (God) I decided to open the front brake fluid reservoir and "check" the fluid, well it was pretty low, looked like muddy waters, but hey the front brakes worked, right! If it ain't broke don't fix it crap. 
Don't listen to God though, just push ahead get on and ride, ya dumb ass... 
Note to self, if your brake fluid looks like Mississippi mud, well maybe you have a "PROBLEM". 
Not me, just filled up the reservoir gave the lever a few pumps, and it felt fine. Leave it alone, it works in your garage, who cares about the open road, right.

Remember the mule kicking my ass?
I prep very carefully for my first true road test of the mule. I double check everything I have fixed, all the nuts and bolts, cotter pins, any fluid leaks, will she start and so on. In the back of my mind is the front brake fluid, haunting me...

Then it is time for AGATT, get all of it on, ready to ride. I saddle up, bring the mule off the center stand, roll her out of the garage and off I go on the first true test ride of a 35 year old motorcycle that I know nothing about. 
Riding any motorcycle for the first time is tenuous at the least. Can you say pucker factor! 
With my experience as a test driver and motorcyclist you start out slow, check how she weaves, stops, accelerates and just performs as a motorcycle should, or what you think a 35 year old motorcycle should do. 
So far so good, 7 miles into the first ride and looking good, no wait I smell smoke, not sure what it is, is it oil? is it 90w drive oil, is it plastic, no wait it is a brake smell, well that's no problem it is one of the trucks or cars around me, no wait why is the front of the mule dragging, why do I not have much acceleration, no wait why is my front brake lever HARD AS A ROCK? 
Shit both front calipers have seized and they are cooking the front rotors, damn I was kicked in the ass by the mule. 
At 60+ miles an hour both front rotors seized and pissed brake fluid out of the calipers! 
I have never had that happen before. I once had a front caliper come off at 75 mph, another story...
Anyway I get the mule shut down and off the road and check my shorts, still dry. Can you say "low side @ 60mph"...
Smoke is coming off of the front rim/rotors with fluid showing on the wheel and the tire. Crap!
I get back on the mule put her in neutral and try and move her nothing. The front nose dives as I push forward, seized brakes. Not good for me. 
I start to weigh my options, piss my pants now or, or wait and see what happens when the rotors cool down. 
I know I don't need no stinkin' front brakes to ride a motorcycle, right! How many times have you heard that line...
After about 5 minutes I again mount the mule and try moving her forward, bingo, freedom, the calipers have released and I have movement of the front tire.
OK,  reality check time, I have 7 miles to ride home on a secondary highway with light traffic. 
I DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' FRONT BRAKES... Right???
Off I go, my pants are a little squishy but not bad. Get the mule up to 50mph doing fine, keep telling myself "DON'T TOUCH THE FRONT BRAKE". This is really hard to over come. 
Both brakes all of the time, right! 
Twice I pull over let traffic pass the "mentally challenged biker" go home...
Once back in my garage safely I first tell myself, if your brake fluid looks like mud, well don't be a dumb ass FIX IT. 
I then thank God that I am still alive to live another day.
I love my "Mule", she kicked my ass, taught me something and will forever be a trusted steed in my herd...

One of the reasons I am not a pilot, not as far to fall...

W

The Mule build update...

Well so far so good.
I was able to accomplish more than I expected/wanted today.
The Mule restoration is proceeding ahead of schedule.

On today's list was the fuel pet cock rebuild. For some reason I was dreading this repair. Not sure why other than maybe I had never done a rebuild like this before. 3 rubber gaskets, a little watch back silicon grease, some Yama Lube gasket sealer and I think the cock is sealed. Preliminary test look good. The value even worked after the rebuild, WTF!

Next project on the list was the spark plugs. I had to take the fuel tank off anyway, thus easy access to the plugs, replace them. Glad I did the right bank was fouled, maybe a future problem, not sure will see.

I still have 20+ days to the DGR so I am trying to pace myself and not freak out on what really has to be done to ride the mule.

I had far less important side projects in the works on the mule. Because everything went so good today, I was able to replace the throttle grip, install the rebuilt front forks, install a repaired RKA tank bag (my baby), install the newly recovered custom King/Queen seat and finish the assembly of the Pannier frame being converted to an advertising platform. 

As you work on an older motorcycle like this you notice other flaws and then have to classify the problem, bad, not so bad just cosmetic. I fixed what I could, and ordered the parts needed to make The Mule true blue...

If the build goes as plans, I should be able to go out and spank the mule without the hack, next week. 

Then if it passes the tests I will mount the side car hack and have a very experienced friend MC mechanic come by and test ride The Mule with the hack on. That's the plan for now. Stay tuned!